Funny statuses

#308

Old people at weddings always poke me n say "You're Next". So I started doing the same to them at funerals....

#130

More people would drink responsibly if there was a brand of vodka named Responsibly.

#205

Say "I won a math debate" really fast.

#329

Still waiting on the "Once you go black, you'll never go back" episode of Mythbusters.

#218

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

#135

It takes many nails to build a crib, but just one screw to fill it.

#295

Closing all the internet windows by the time your boss gets to your desk is like getting the keys into the door before the killer gets you.

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