WTF statuses

#3516

I wonder if Charlie Brown can refer me to a good grief counselor.

#3517

This message will self destruct in.........................................................It's still here huh?

#3518

It's always good to feel appreciated. My little brother just called to thank me for "setting the bar so incredibly low for him."

#3519

I'd like to party like its 1999, then I realize that was 14 years ago and I can't stay up past 11 o'clock now. So screw you Prince.

#3501

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.

#3502

Gaining followers on Twitter isn't success. It's just failure with more witnesses.

#3503

Ever notice that people who usually wear sweatpants hardly ever sweat?

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