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Funny Facebook Statuses

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Fresh Nominations...
Amigo
Cyberbilly
Novell
Robert Zunick
Cris
Okay, I can't take it anymore. What in the hell holds the blocks up in Mario Brothers?
Lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake.
Some days, the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands!
The fact that Burger King can sell you 10 chicken nuggets for $1.49 should concern you more than it should entice you.
It’s all fun and games until they reply to your text with a phone call.
Autocorrect changed “you’re so wise” to “you’re so wide”, and now I need to find a good hiding spot before my wife comes home.
I’m going to start telling women that I’m available for a limited time only in hopes that their shopping instinct kicks in.