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Fresh Nominations...
Robert Zunick
Everyday I run into someone who pushes me past the limits of my medication.
Nothing bonds women faster than finding out that they hate the same people.
It’s amazing how long you can hold your farts at the beginning of a relationship.
Sometimes when I'm bored I like to go to the mall, find a great parking spot, and just sit in my car with the reverse lights on.
If your problem can’t be solved by me saying “damn” and nodding a lot, then you shouldn’t come to me for help.
You'd think Pizza Hut would be able to upgrade to a house by now.
My foot’s not just asleep it's outright coma toes