Funny Status Ideas

Calling them garage door openers is only half the story.

If you really want students to not read a book, just assign it.

if roosters can start each day screaming, then damn it, so can I

Due to Quarantine, I will only be telling inside jokes

Velcro is a ripoff

Avocados are must halves.

I accidentally changed my GPS voice to “Male”. Now it just says “it’s around here somewhere, just keep driving”.